Day 6 - Becoming less judgemental

Crap cleared: old magazines

　

　

I took the laptop with me to the hairdresser on Friday with the intention of writing while the colour was working its magic on my head, but found myself drawn to the celebrity gossip magazines instead. I never buy them, but do have fun flicking through the pages and reading the random article when I happen to be in the vicinity of a Woman’s Day, Who or New Idea, which is usually in waiting rooms or grocery store queues. Oh, the glam of the Grammys, the astounding celebrity post-baby bodies, the gorgeous fashion and perfect faces!!

I turned a page and stared straight at Fairlie Arrow’s adjusted face. I was struck by her manufactured look - the one people get when they’ve had just a little too much work done on their face. I was all ready to say to myself, and possibly the hair stylist, "Oh my God, look at her face! You can just tell that she’s had plastic surgery. Her face just looks so fake." What did I think having plastic surgery meant about a person? But in that instant, I caught myself being judgemental. Those words that were forming in my mind when I looked at her changed and I formed no direct opinion of this person. I simply observed the facts of the image before me.

Fairlie, an Australian, now living in the US, faked her own kidnapping 20 years ago, when she was working as a model on the Gold Coast. Media reports at the time said that she did it to draw attention to herself in order to further her career. In this article, Fairlie shared the real reason why she did it - an action in response to extreme emotional trauma from being stalked when the police could or would not do anything to help her.

While we can’t believe everything we read in magazines, for me this reinforced that we cannot ever truly know what is going on with another person. And I should know - I never truly knew what was going on with my ex-husband for the 14 years that we were together, until the day he told me his secret and that was when the Crap hit the fan.... but I’ll save that one for another day!

I looked at Fairlie’s face and realised that those external features do not define her. I have recently become aware that when we make a judgement about others, it is really a reflection of ourselves, and to catch myself evaluating her looks made me consider what I think about my own appearance. And you know what?.... I’m ok!!

 I   think   I’m   ok  !!

  (That’s definitely a move on from the time shortly after my marriage ended when I went and had a consultation for a boob job... ha ha!). And I think Fairlie’s. pretty ok too.

Today I found this quote by Carl Jung ~

"Everything that irritates us about others

Can lead us to an understanding of ourselves"

　

　

I returned from the hairdressers a tad blonder, a tad happier, and I threw out a pile of old magazines.

　

Day 6 observations:

　

When I feel good on the inside, I like the way I look on the outside